Ayeee Lmao I'm Megan

heymrsamerica:

You’re gay? That’s cool.
You’re straight? That’s cool.
You’re bi? That’s cool.
You’re asexual? That’s cool.
You’re gender fluid? That’s cool.
You’re happy with who you are and what you identify as? That’s COOL.
You’re an asshole? That’s not cool.
It’s that simple.

codeinewarrior:

me: hey can i have some money?

bank teller: do you have an account with us?

me: nah i just heard yall got money

cyclopette:

*wakes up at 9* nice

*immediately falls asleep, wakes up at noon* less nice

addelburgh:

farewell

addelburgh:

farewell

handjob:

"everybody put your hands in the air!" yells the robber at the night club. the clubbers think he is the DJ and keep dancing. maybe he should have picked a different location

firelorcl:

dermatologists HATE me. everyone hates me. i’m so alone

endocrines2:

*drinks vodka* *gags* “ugh I hate vodka” *drinks vodka*

thebeastfromthebigeast:

quackenbuschlight:

i remember one time this dude sent me a shirtless pic with the caption “lol maybe u can save this for a rainy day ;)”

and i was like “for what? to keep me dry? because that’s what it’s doing right now”

image